Dating A Smoker | Dating Experiences

I myself am a smoker, but I understand completely your need to date a non smoker. Especially, if it causes you problems with your own quitting. If you are uncomfortable around a smoker, by all means, look for smn who’ll understand this and won’t smoke in your presence.

I am a moderate smoker (yes, nasty habit) but never smoke around someone who doesn't like it. Now, if it becomes an issue in a relationship, then that should be motivation enough to make an effort to quit. And also ask your partner to help.

I smoke, not proud of it, know that many people dont like it and can see why. I like smoking so i carry on. I had been married for 12 yrs to a non smoker. I never smoked in the house and respected her not liking it. I would say being honest that it was a bone of contention between us though and resulted in spurious nagging! if I were looking for someone else and they smoked it would be a hell of a lot more easy for me than tip toeing round a fussing non smoker. Forcing someone to quit for you is probably not a good idea unless they really want to.

Now where's my fags.....hee hee

I was always adamant I wouldn't get involved with a smoker, but the person I met kept it hidden from me until I already had feelings for him, so I accepted it. Except it was always a low-level problem, really. He only ever smoked outside, but he would come in stinking of cigarettes, I hated it. We either had to sit outside at events and be cold, or sit inside and I'd be on my own while he 'smirked' outside with other smokers. Even when we went for a romantic weekend in Paris, it was partially spoiled because we had to walk for miles looking for somewhere he could buy cigarettes, with him getting more and more ratty. I wouldn't date a smoker again - and if he hid it from me at first, I would take that as a sign that he was capable of hiding more than just that from me.

hi gorgeous do like northerners

As a non-smoker I'd prefer to date a non-smoker.

However, if I felt like there was a real connection with someone who did smoke then it would not put me off.

This thread is over hyped like the ban! surely it comes down to the person at the end of the day and not if he or she smokes.  Smokers all ready a hard time in the uk.  But we are the most socialable people you will ever find.  But people have got to judge in the uk havn't they and unfortuntely smokers are the tartget.  Surely it be worst if he or she did drugs or would it?

That rules out Robbie Williams  then lol!

Wow you need to give the guy some lee-way, just like i read in other another post, smokers are already getting a hard time in this day and age in the UK, its now not cool to smoke, a smoker is looked upon as pathetic. But lets look at this another way. I Drink very little, i get a date and she drinks, we go to kiss and she smells like a vodka making factory, i would find this horrible, but i would certainly not judge this person because she does some-thing that I'm not too keen on, and i certainly would not blank them out because of this minor issue, because that's what it is a minor issue...

I'm not having a go at you, But i sense that your looking for faults in this guy, no-body is perfect, how can we expect our partners to be who we want them to be, of course this guy could change and stop smoking, after all you have been there, so you should know why people smoke and what they get from it and what it takes to stop. And this makes your complaint evan worse and hardly puts you in the position to judge this guy because of his smoking habits, i feel what you need to do, is look at the bigger picture and possibly tell this guy how you feel to his face, and not come on here looking for advice, and you should maybe give him advice on how to stop though your own experiences of stopping smoking..After all talking and helping and discussing each others issues is very important in a relationship, and if you cannot do this with the guy, maybe you should take a look at why you cannot talk to him about it, why do you look for faults in people and make big issues about it..Lets say you ditch this guy because of smoking, you find another guy, you find a minor fault in him, your not happy you ditch him, its a never ending process, and you will never be happy. No-Body is perfect, we all have to make a scarf ice to make a relationship work....

StarCat1 wrote:

Am I crazy for not wanting to date someone who Smokes cigarettes? I quit smoking cigarettes almost 2 mos ago. Well I met a man about 4 wks ago. We had alot of things in common. The communication, trust and he was not a jealous type of man at all. Which is really rare now a days. I really liked this man. But he smokes. Have you ever heard an expression "Kissing a smoker is like **** a ashtray"? And when me and him kissed he did taste like an ashtray. I didn't enjoy kissing. I know this is sad. Hope to hear some input here. Thank you.

i like your comments about the things you have in common communication,trust you obviously like this guy tell him how you feel he carnt read your mind im sure he wouldnt want something thats so easily rectifide to stand in the way of some thing that has possabilities of being so good

Hi I married a smoker and put up with it for 15years, when he had a heart attack and stopped.  But then three years later he started again, and I hated it .  Not just him smelling, but the whole house stank.  If you really like this guy, tell him he stinks, and then it is up to him to make the choice of whether he thinks the relationship is worth making changes for.  But if he stays a smoker, walk away. He's not worth years of smell for. Also he is the one that has to make the descision to stop, and if he thinks your worth it he may well do that. Good luck.

I quit around 8 months ago. I started dating a girl who smoked, she made a point of it too. It didn't last long as I soon realised that she was making a point of doing other things to annoy me. If I want to stay quit, I don't think dating somebody who does smoke will help. It was hard enough quitting in the first place.

Sometimes you fall for somebody regardless of some things you don't agree with or like.

i dated a smoker for the longest time before we decided we would help her try and quit,we split up but i know for a fact she's still not smoking almost 2 years after,if you feel strongly about this person,help them quit and put aside any doubts and fears about your own smoking experiences.

i smoke and have dated smokers and non smokers alike, whenever i dated a non smoker it was a bit of a pain trying to smoke well before and after i saw her, but as i always smoke at the door in my house when i had to go for a cig whilst she was here i just stayed there a bit longer than normal and had a drink of tea, or a mint, its really not that big of an issue i dont think, the persons either worth it or their not, and if their not worth putting up with something like smoking then its not going to work because your either not communicating your feelings or prepared to make the sacrifice.

They often say that there's nothing worse than an ex-smoker. Personally, I've never smoked and would prefer any future partners not to either- not just for myself but for my son too.

girltoon wrote:

I was always adamant I wouldn't get involved with a smoker, but the person I met kept it hidden from me until I already had feelings for him, so I accepted it. Except it was always a low-level problem, really. He only ever smoked outside, but he would come in stinking of cigarettes, I hated it. We either had to sit outside at events and be cold, or sit inside and I'd be on my own while he 'smirked' outside with other smokers. Even when we went for a romantic weekend in Paris, it was partially spoiled because we had to walk for miles looking for somewhere he could buy cigarettes, with him getting more and more ratty. I wouldn't date a smoker again - and if he hid it from me at first, I would take that as a sign that he was capable of hiding more than just that from me.

I have been in the exact same situation, and I agree with you, it does ruin things in a relationship. You cant be spontaneous.

I find it quite curious why the smokers feel they're being **** out for being smokers. This thread is clearly asking people if they would, or wouldn't date a smoker. It's not asking smokers to come on and defend themselves, nor is it saying something about people who do smoke.
The question StarCat1 asked is, is she crazy for not wanting to date a smoker? I think this led onto 'would people date a smoker if they didn't like the smoke smell, but did like the person?

Smoking isn't a crime and people who smoke are not criminals. But the point is, where smoking used to be more socially accepted, it isn't now. Non-smokers, in the old days, were the people who were the outcasts. Their complaints of the smell of smoke on their clothes, or the unpleasentness (if that's a real word) of kissing a smoker were mostly ignored, or shouted down with comments like 'If you don't like it, go somewhere else'. Now the shoe is on the other foot. Smoking is less socially accepted and non-smokers voices are being heard more strongly. And don't think I don't know what I'm talking about. I smoked for 17 years before I gave it up almost 16 years ago.

I don't mind smokers, or smoking. But I don't like my clothes smelling of it (can't say about kissing a smoker because I never have since quitting). However, if I met someone I genuinely liked/hit it off with and they smoked, I would do everything in my power to come to some sort of compromise with them. We spend far too much time on our own, looking for the perfect person, to just throw them away because they smoke. Or drink Pernod. Or like Marmite. Or any number of thigs we can work around.

I say talk to him. Bring your own packet of Tic-Tacs on your next date. Buy one of those breath-freshener spray thingies. Anything, but don't let your chance of true love disappear in a puff of smoke (see what I did with that last bit?).

I'm a lifelong non-smoker and i'm finding it increasingly difficult to find any non-smoking ladies...And yes it is just like **** an ashtray!!!

Im a non-smoker, but if the person that I really wanted to be with smoked it wouldnt put me off