Am I Frigid ? | Dating Advice

janeygirl18 wrote:

Am I frigid ?

Am I a self-absorbed insensitive biatch ?

It's not that I mean to be a cocktail-tease;
it's just that I don't know what the **** I want out of Life, or a relationship.

Yeah, I was let down by my past fella (mind you he has a different version of events) so I'll blame every on the next fella who comes along.

O.K. So I appear superficially cold, withdrawn, unloving, non-**** and dull, but I'm a nice girl underneath it all, really I am (I have a C.V. to prove it and a endorsement from my headmistress).

Why then do I always **** up ?
E.G.  I was sitting looking really nice and perky, in my philosophy class yesterday and this bozzo comes up to me and says:  "Will you do just one thing for me? SMILE!"
I gave him an icy glare (my usual pissed off face) and responded with: " I only smile when I find something amusing to smile about. Your pathetic comedic attempt is funny in a  tedious way, but not THAT funny”.
Sure he pissed off, but where did that leave me ?
My rabbit batteries need new carrots !

I'm really shy and reserved, but I get taken for a total ice queen.
I'm not kidding, like THE U.K. Ice Queen.

Hell, I don't even know what I am.
Am I  like a bitter or sweet tasting cupcake ?
A bruised banana - Nice on the outside, but rotten on the inside ?
I might look like a sweet and beautiful girl, but underneath am I just cold blooded and heartless ?

Everyone gives up on me because, they give up on 'cracking' this impossible glacier.

Sure, I come across a beautiful woman with an ugly personality; one who disregards the feelings of others or a beautiful woman who refuses **** advances.

Some call me frigid; others a cold and haughty woman.
Maybe I do lack the ability or experience to empathize or put myself in "another's shoes".
But I'm me, so what if I lack the ability, or choose not to, effectively define or react to another's mode of thought and mood ?
Why can't they adapt to me ?

I maybe a woman who is so OVERLY concerned with my situation, my past relationship, my professional (with knobs on) career, that I do not prioritize or account for another's needs.

O.K. I lack empathy in situations where a another's needs are clearly greater than my wants.

Yes, I am very unsexual and unaffectionate, and I can be very cold to my prospective man  during the date. My traits include: throwing around barbs even after it's funny and just being rude, vindictive and cruel – hey I'm a catch, a Princess, I can't help it.

I don't mean to inflict emotional scaring and cruelty, it's just that I am totally self obsessed and act like a perfect lil "nice" princess.
Really I will insult you to tears faster than u can say "that's not true!
(I have " beware of ice queens...” Tattooed on my ****).

Why deny it, I'm a frigid **** who thinks her shit doesn't stink and ignores men's advances and usually whines about everything. If you got an ice queen (like me) on your arm, you'd best kick me out the door, because you have no chance in hell of slipping your beef into me. My primary language is complaints.

Seriously I don't mean to be a cold hearted, vicious, prude or a merciless, unbothered cold blooded, heartless and unforgiving person, but I've made it habitual.
If you meet me watch out.
If u harbour the notion u might be able to melt me by pleasing me into submission.. u are severely mistaken.

By the way, i like him to, but im afraid of getting to close( i dont want to get hurt) like in the past.

He thinks I am cold and hard to get close to. I admit I am afraid, so I'm probably in some type of protection mode.

I try to let him know that I just want to take it slow, that really I think he's a great guy and I don't mean to seem cold, but by that time he's usually pissed off because he thinks I'm aloof, distant or thinks I'm cold and have no heart, or feelings.

Often I think he is having a playful dig at me. I act kind of uninterested towards him. He feels like he is putting himself out there and getting nowhere.

I'm so dumb I never really let him know that I am not an ice princess.
I know that I can still be genuinely nice to him without getting too involved.
Just take it slow and let him know that I'm afraid of getting too close too fast. as long as I'm not rude about it and sensitive towards his feelings, he will understand.

Stuck up Ice Princess ?
Well, people call me that sometimes. I'm really shy, and pretty distant. I'm just not good at expressing my feelings. I'm a passionate person, but I save it for special times.
So most of the time, I come off as "cold" and cool hearted.
He's frustrated that I wont sleep/or just be friends with him and tell him how I really feel.

He thinks I am too hard to melt, but senses that under my icy cold exterior, a normal girl exists.
He can relate that I have been hurt by a cold unfeeling man in the past.
WTF – I'll just **** him off too and the rest.
What can I say ?
I'm pissed at Life and I don't even realise it.

Quite a charactor assassination, I don't think you like yourself very much.  Why not read through it and see what changes you could make to like yourself more.

Wow Janeygirl. As the man said that's quite the character assasination! These are just things we all go through. You most likely need to meet someone who is willing to work hard for you....there are still some out there! But you know what they say, how can you love anyone if you dont love yourself? You've got to either accept the way you are and love that about yourself, or else work hard to make big changes that make you happy! x